Article From The Australian Tribune, 1894

After El Osito Diablo's attack on Chachinqua Penal Colony, he devised a plan to conquer earth. First he built an army. In order to fool people, he turned the most innocent looking creatures he could find into killers. These of course were koalas, marshmallow peeps, and certain breeds of cupcakes.

To the koalas, he gave his vampire power. When koalas kill people the corpse becomes a koala. It gets up and kills, much like the vampire or zombie.

To the marshmallow peeps, he gave the power of regeneration. Peeps steadily grow throughout their lives, and also multiply at an alarming rate.

To the cupcake warriors, he gave the ability to ride and fight on horseback better than any other race on earth.

All of these devilish creatures are as smart as you and I. Since their creation, each race has enhanced their abilties. Koalas have learned numerous ways to destroy anything. There is a page on this site dedicated to their methods. Peeps have grown in millions and have invented an arsenal of weaponry including pigeons and pinwheel daggers. Cupcake warriors aren't really all that smart. You should still watch out for them though.